What bags..

..of horse manure they are, kicking and punching and old man and his wife.
The couple, who retired from their bakery store two years ago, were in the kitchen of their Richard Crescent home in Cecil Hills preparing dinner around 1740 when two men who they described as being in their early 20s and wearing hooded jumpers entered through a rear sliding glass door and started kicking and punching them.
What cowardly vermin they are.
Both victims were knocked to the ground and the attackers then took the woman's jewellery, including a diamond ring, bracelets and a gold necklace. They were then taken upstairs to their bedroom where the man with the shotgun suddenly aimed at the bed and fired.

After stealing clothes and a computer - placed into pillow slips and a doona cover - the intruders took the victims downstairs to the living room and bound their hands with cords from their stereo player. It was here the home owner duped the robbers into thinking he was securely bound.

"The first thing I think in my mind is I have to leave the space [between both] hands,'' he said. "And when he tied both my hands behind my back I had a little gap ... I tried to free myself and I [got free] but I pretend I [was] sick and vomiting. "So the second guy, he was holding the gun, and he put the gun on the breakfast bench and he tie up my wife.

"Then I stand up behind him and grab the gun. "I said `I've got the gun! I will shoot you!' to make them scared.'' One of the thieves fled out the back door immediately upon realising his victim had the gun.
I would have shot the bastard, bugger the recoil, one less piece of scum the taxpayer has to deal with. But the old man was probably aware that he would have been in much hot water for not calling the United Nations to mediate or getting an AVO, prior to this.
"The other one was in the lounge room, so I chased him. "He was hiding behind a wall and I said, 'I've got the gun! Come here! I've got the gun!' and he came out and put two hands on the back of his head'.''

He then hit the robber three times with the barrel of the gun. "I bust him on the head three times.'' Then the robber grabbed for the weapon and they fell to the ground, wrestling for control of the loaded shotgun.
He's lucky the scum was still able to grab for the gun, imagine he beat him unconscious, the bleeding hearts would weep and wail, the mean old man with the big mean gun, he was only a baby, took the wrong turn in the wrong street oh boooo hoooo.
"The gun fell about a metre away and I tried to get back the gun, and he wanted to get the gun too and so then we fight, just for a second, and then my wife freed herself and grabbed two knives and is screaming 'I kill you! I kill you!' and he saw my wife had the knife and he's run away.''
Good on ya maam, brought 2 knives to a gunfight, gave that piece of excrement the whipping of his life.
A dog unit was called to the scene to try to track the offenders but the trail was already cold.
If only the trail hadn't gone cold, I can see the officer, hat in hand (giggling occasionally) explaining to superior officers at the Royal Commission.

You see there was this banana peel in the grass, I slipped on it and fluffy was pulling hard at the leash and he broke away, he is such a gentle dog, I don't know what happened. Then this train came out of nowhere and I had to wait till it was gone, I prayed that fluffy would be ok, but by then, oh dear, it was too late. I watched in horror as fluffy just tossed his testicles aside. I tried to retrieve them for reattachment but there was a freak thunderstorm and all that screaming distracted me, they just got washed away in the rain, such a painful loss, so sad.

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